Beginning with the end in mind: Why who you are matters most

It was a Celebration of Life; an opportunity for family, friends and others to gather to celebrate the life of Rene Nevin Hollinger; a loving, kind and giving individual who touched countless others during her 83 years on Earth.

From oldest to youngest, each of Rene's three adult children stood in front of those gathered on Friday to share stories of their mum. They talked about her compassion towards others, her belief in God and commitment to her church. They laughed about her gift of gab and smiled as they reflected on Rene's passion for writing, particularly her love of poetry. Rene's grandson, one of twelve grandchildren, read 'Fear Not,' one of Rene's favorites.

Tears fell and voices cracked as two sons and a daughter reflected on how much they are going to miss their mum.

The words spoken that day gave no hint of what Rene did for a living; no indication of financial success or breadth of material possessions. What was known is that Rene was loving, kind, generous, fun, faithful, welcoming, and a host of other traits that define who someone is.

The celebration was a reminder of a study I came across years ago. When asked to talk about what matters most in life as individuals neared the end, the top two responses were who they were in life (i.e., personal character) and who they were in the lives of those they loved most. The bottom two were work and money earned and bequeathed.

None of this (likely) surprises you. You read this post knowing that who you are in life is what matters most; that you appreciate others being who they can be for you. What you may not be as conscious of is who you are being each day.

What percentage of a typical day are you consciously aware of who you are being for your self and others? Pause and reflect on this.

Having asked this question of thousands of individuals over the past 20+ years the most common answer falls below 10%. What's your percentage? Are you more focused on 'being' or 'doing'? Do you spend more of each day experiencing joy, equanimity and wholeness or some version of stress, anxiety and emptiness?

If all that matters in the end is who you were in life, how important is it that you are consciously aware of who you are being each moment of each day?

Begin 2024 with the end in mind. Be conscious of the focus of your mindset as you go through your day. Rest in the knowledge that who you are is what matters most today, tomorrow and every day thereafter.

Rejoice in the fact that who you are not only defines your legacy, it also determines the degree of emotional, mental, spiritual, physical, social, occupational, intellectual, and financial wellbeing you experience in life. One focus. So many opportunities for growth.

Use this post to elevate your self-awareness. A small increase in the focus of your consciousness (e.g., from 10%-15%) can have a significant impact on your wellbeing and that of others. There is so much you can do when you know who to be.

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