Resolving to Be: What Matters Most

Each day presents you with the opportunity to be that much better than you were the day before. Every...single...day!

Friday was, “National Quitters Day.”

About 80% of New Year’s resolutions will be abandoned by the end of the month. Less than 10% of you that set a resolution will achieve it by the end of the year.

It’s the classic definition of insanity: doing the same thing year after year and expecting different results. It’s easy to feel discouraged.

You know the feeling: wanting to make positive and lasting change. But if simply knowing what to start or stop doing was enough, wouldn’t we all be living ideal lives?

You’re not alone in wanting more for yourself and those you love most. You are also not alone in having everything you need within you to create the life you desire.

You are a human being, not a human doing. It’s a crucial distinction. Achieving your goals—including the inner peace, joy, and fulfillment so many seek—isn’t about doing something; it’s about being someone. It is who you are, for your self and others, that matters most.

And yet, every January (and throughout the year for many), we ignore the one thing required to have everything. Our inner self. Time for change.

The process begins as before.

·      Step 1 – Document Your Vision (some prefer a Vision Board)

Beginning with the end in mind, where do you want to be at the end of 2025? Break this into six key areas: Self, Relationships, Physical Wellness, Leisure, Career, and Money. Go big here! The world is your oyster when you know who to be.

·      Step 2 – Establish the Goals Needed to Achieve Your Vision

Start with one (SMART) goal per area. This keeps things manageable and allows you to build momentum. Celebrate each small victory along the way!

·      Step 3 – Change Your Mindset

This is where change is needed. The sine qua non in achieving your goals and realizing your vision begins by replacing your “doing-focused” thought process with a “being-centric” mindset. “I will achieve my goals and realize my vision by doing _____” is replaced with, “I will achieve my goals and realize my vision by being _______.” It’s a shift that changes everything.

·      Step 4 – Define Your Core Values and Core Purpose

Core Values – Who do you need to be to achieve your goals and realize your vision? This isn't about external achievements. It’s centered on the kind of person you want, and in many ways need, to become.

1.     Identify 4-6 core values by completing the statement, “I need to be __________ to achieve my goals and realize my vision."

2.     Once identified, explore and document what it truly means to embody each one. For example, what does it mean, to you, to be “caring,” "disciplined," "resilient," or “courageous”?

3.     Memorize each. Apply often. This embeds the context of your core values within your subconscious mind, providing you with the skill set needed be your best self, do your best work and live your best life.

Core Purpose – As Mark Twain wisely observed, “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” It’s a profound realization. Why are you here? Pause and reflect on this. Write out a clear and concise core purpose.

Less than 10% of individuals experience that second day. That’s unfortunate. Your core purpose is the inner spark ignites your passion, guides your decisions, and illuminates your life’s path.

·      Step 5 – Enjoy Life as It Is Meant to Be Lived

Aristotle was right, “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

Knowing who you need to be and understanding your “why” creates a powerful foundation for a truly fulfilling life. It’s from this place of self-knowledge that true meaning, joy and fulfillment arise. This is why individuals describe these steps as “Life-changing!” “A miracle that happened at the right time!” “A Godsend!” and “It takes ordinary people and makes them extraordinary!”

Resolve to be. Research indicates that people who align their goals with personal values are 64% more likely to succeed. Twenty-plus years of experience guiding hundreds of individuals through the steps above suggests that this is a conservative figure.

As you embrace this new year, remember that it's not about the goals you chase. It's about the journey you embark on within your self. Aligning your values to your goals and embracing your core purpose can turn fleeting aspirations into newfound levels of personal growth and professional success. As your peers will attest to, when you focus on being, the doing tends to take care of itself. Here’s to a great 2025!

Note: These steps are not confined to your personal life; they apply equally well to your family, your team and your organization, fostering deeper connections and more meaningful contributions for the benefit of all.

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

And when we bring what is within us out into the world, miracles happen.

– Henry Stanley Haskins

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